Whats on your mind

So everyone loves the little updates about what Im doing, but apparently people want to hear about what I have been thinking about and etc. I suppose that stuff is a little harder to share, but since I was on the train today for a good 13 hours and had to switch trains 5 times I had a lot of time to think.


So I was reading though Psalms waiting for something to jump out at me and it did. In Psalm 90:12 there is a line that says: Teach us to number our days so that we may gain a heart of wisdom. Of course I am all about gaining wisdom, learning as much as possible, and reading all that I can so I was interested in how I could gain wisdom from numbering our days. So I did it, I determined Ive been here for about 8300 days if you round up. The way I took the scripture to mean was that we need to treat every day like a gift and make the most of it. The bottom line is to not have any wasted days. So when I look at something like 8300 days I cant help but think of how many days Ive already wasted without being aware of it. If I am lucky I could live to be 100 which means about 365,000 days are in total. It brings me joy to think of this because I am making the most of every day that I am on this trip. I havent had a single moment when I have thought I have wasted an opportunity. I guess the wisdom comes from making the most of every day and being aware that we only have a limited time to experience all that we can on earth. I feel like there is so much to experience in the world and I would be foolish to not try and experience all these different places and cultures. To at least have a little taste of all that has been put here for us to experience is all that I ask for.


This brought me back to a conversation I was having with someone I ran into along the way when we were talking about our travels and what we are trying to accomplish on our journeys. He had some feeling that life owes him and that he deserves to see everything out there, where I on the other hand was stressing that life owes us nothing, but we in fact owe everything to life. I feel like he was traveling to escape his life, where as I am traveling to make sure that life doesnt escape me. I hope that no one at home thinks that I was trying to escape from them, the truth is I cant wait to get back home and see friends and family again, but that doesnt mean I am not also enjoying every moment I am having abroad.


Anyway I think maybe the point is that the real path to wisdom is to try and experience everything that God, by his magesty and grace, has given us the opportunity to experienece. Life is a risk, and that you never know who youre going to meet and who wil have an impact on you, or challenge you. I said I was getting tired of telling people the same old story about who I am and what I am doing and luckily I have realized that I should not get tired of that. I need to put myself out there even if its just for an hour or two. I need to take chance, take risks, and if it doesnt go how I wated I will never see those people again. Of course it going how I wanted is a hard to do since I have yet to find anyone whos standard for human interaction has been as high as mine.



Anyway, this took me back to a previous thought that dealt with shareing thoughts. I believe its hard to write everything that Im thinking in a readable and linear way because thoughts are, in fact, not linear at all. I am fascinated with the articulation of thoughts. I believe it is a subconscious goal of mine to reach a point where I can write down what I am thinking in a coherent way. A way which would inspire others. Inspire others to think, but not think like me, but to think for themselves. By using a medium that I have deemed as imperfect to track my thoughts and journey while in Europe I am not necessarily doomed for failure. I have learned this from CS Lewis, from Dostoevsky and Rand that writing can be extremely efficient. I believe all people have profound things to say, but those that have been given the gift of articulation, thereby the gift of reaching people and having an impact on them… they are remembered forever. That is what is so appealing about writing. This is why I inevitably feel as though I need to document my trip and give people a chance to reflect on it. I fear that I will lose track of what I wanted to write, or not get my thoughts across and therefore have only shared about what I have encountered. I do not think that will stop me from transferring my scattered thoughts onto these pages. Even now my head is full of things to write down about my trip and to get off my mind. Luckily I have a journal for most of the scattered things flying though my head. The presence of such an overwhelming amount of thoughts, ideas, commentary, which are present in every person make it a chore to organize them and articulate them in a manner fitting for others to see. Fortunately for me these pages do not tremble. These pages don’t blush, and there is no such thing as a shy blog. If anything this medium has the potential to let people know what I am really feeling. We´ll see how that works out.



Cant wait for you to get here brother. Two more weeks!



-Kyle